The truth is, I’m addicted to my diet; I’m addicted to staying lean; and I’m addicted to reality television -but that’s another post for an entirely unrelated blog so we’ll focus on the first two addictions for now.

I’ve been training with weights since 1990. I discovered the weights when I dropped out of Spanish IV and chose a different elective, weightlifting. But I don’t think the class was called weightlifting. It may have been called something else. Actually, now that I think about it, it may have been an art class I replaced with Spanish IV and not weightlifting. Either way, it doesn’t matter. The point is I discovered lifting a long time ago.

I remember the first time I ever went to the gym I did so many sets and reps of bicep curls that I could not lift or straighten my arm enough to even comb my hair the next morning. It was awesome and I was hooked. However, it took me a while before I got the diet part right.  Back then I ate bananas, white rice and tuna, bagels, and Kellog’s Special K and thought that was eating healthy. Not surprisingly, I never grew on that diet.

Eventually I got it right, though, and even went on to compete in several natural bodybuilding shows and earn my NGA pro card. It was not until I learned how to eat like a bodybuilder and manipulate my diet to keep the muscle on and the fat off that things went wrong -or right, depending on how you look at it I guess.

By now more than half of my existence on this planet has been devoted to this lifestyle. I know no other way to be and that’s kind of the problem. Does that make it a habit or an addiction? Maybe a little of both?

Before I had a wife and son, I would live, breathe, sleep, eat, and shit bodybuilding. Now I live, breathe, sleep, eat, and shit bodybuilding while also being a devoted husband and father. In other words, not much has really changed as far as my passion for the sport. It’s pretty easy for me to maintain this lifestyle, though, because my wife shares my passion for fitness and eating healthy. The difference is that she knows how not to be enslaved by her diet and I don’t. …Although one might accuse her of being addicted to staying lean, too.

Why so strict?

So why the strict adherence to this lifestyle? Let me explain.

As has already been established, I’ve been living this way for 19 years now. I’ve eaten the same thing day in and day out for six meals a day for pretty much that whole amount of time. Partly because I thrive on structure, and not having to think what I’m going to eat for my next meal is convenient. But mostly because of the fact that each meal was deliberately chosen based on it’s specific ratio of protein, carbs, and fat  …and eating the same diet kept me lean. 

See, that’s the problem. I like to be lean and have a “six-pack.” Hell, I’ve had a six-pack for as long as I can remember. I fear that not knowing my macronutrient profile and not having a structured diet plan and just throwing my “diet” out the window and eating willy-nilly-style will cause me to gain fat. Don’t get me wrong, I usually have a cheat meal at least once a week, sometimes twice. But my problem is that if I don’t weigh out my food and stick to my daily diet then I tend to over eat. It’s like my brain doesn’t have that switch that tells me, “Greg, you might be approaching a state of fullness now. You’d better put the fork down.”

The decision to loosen up

About six weeks ago after many many many months of urging, my wife convinced me to step outside of my comfort zone and not feel like I have to eat exactly the same same each and every day. I agreed to give it a shot. Here’s how that is going.

At first I felt liberated, like screw it, I’m going to just eat whatever the hell I want now. I kind of did. I stopped eating my usual beef, eggs, and oatmeal concoction (“beefcakes”) every morning for breakfast and I replaced it with waffles, toast, no beef, and just ate omelets, sometimes would have french toast, cereal, etc. For lunch I pretty much ate the same thing except now I may use Shake’n'Bake on my chicken and I’ll eat Uncle Ben’s Southwestern Style Brown Rice instead of sweet potatoes. Broccoli stayed, of course. Still a ridiculously healthy meal. For dinner (meal 5) I went from 10 oz. lean ground beef and 7 oz. broccoli to a delicious medley of ground beef, broccoli, green peppers, onions, garlic diced tomatoes, black beans, Mrs. Dash’s Fiesta seasoning, cheese, and topped with a little bit of sour cream. Mmmm.

Meals 2, 4, I left exactly the same. Meal 6 I reduced the amount of protein powder I was eating.

While I changed up my breakfast, lunch and dinner a little and started adding more variety if I wanted it, overall I just began eating less. Less beef, less chicken, less protein powder.

And guess what? because I was eating less I lost a few pounds. I got leaner. And I liked what  saw in the mirror more.

And guess what that meant. My addiction intensified. And the vicious cycle continues.  

So whereas at the beginning I was saying screw it and not measuring anything and eating a cookie here and there and big bowls of cereal, etc. Now I’m still mixing up my food choices …but they are the same food choices in the same portions! I inherently fall right back into a pattern – a structure.

Now what?

So what to do? I think in order to ever eat like a normal human being I would have to quit bodybuilding altogether. I’m aware that many (most?) people go to the gym and exercise for the sole reason of being able to BE loose on their diet (and I use the term “diet” to mean simply “what they eat” not a diet in the traditional sense of the word). But for me, I go to the gym to challenge myself, to get bigger muscles, to create the body I envision in my mind. And my food choices are an important element in that journey. I guess that’s why I stay so strict with it.

And I guess that’s why I’ll always be messed up in the head.

What about you? Are you able to be a bodybuilder and still be carefree with your diet? How?! Help a brother out!

The floating buffet 

Have you ever been on a cruise? If so, then you know that they are a heck of a good time. You may also agree that they are essentially nothing but floating buffets. And floating bars. And floating casinos. Ok, and floating photography studios, too. But mostly buffets. It’s an over-eaters paradise and a bodybuilders evil, evil temptress. Last week my wife and I went on a 7-day cruise to the Caribbean. This was my second cruise and my wife’s first. We left out of Tampa, FL, which is about six hours from our home. Our first port was the Cayman Islands, the second port was Cozumel, third one was Belize, and our last stop was Isla Roatan. They were all amazingly beautiful. We had a great time and it was a much needed break for us both.

Now, to tell you that my wife, Penny, and I eat healthy is a gross understatement. Our friends and family all claim we are “not human” and marvel at our militant-like discipline to our diet. I’m not saying everyone should be like this, I’m not even particularly proud to say it, but personally I enjoy eating this way. First, I rather like what I eat. No, it’s not cheeseburgers and fries or dessert everyday but let’s face it, I wouldn’t eat the same thing every single day if I didn’t like it. Secondly, I never have to think about what I’m going to eat next because everyday I eat the exact same thing. And when you eat six meals a day like I do then knowing what you’re going to eat next without thinking about it saves a lot of time, not to mention it frees up my mind to think about other more important things, like how I’m going to pay for all the food I eat!

The pre-cruise expectation

Now, I expected to go on this cruise and enjoy myself and relax on my diet. My wife also said the same. Frankly, we were both looking forward to eating whatever we wanted whenever we wanted. Carbohydrates, bring ‘em on!

Not 30 minutes after we boarded the ship did we discover, much to our delight, that there was already food being served at the buffets (notice buffet is plural). We were like two kids walking into Charlie’s Chocolate Factory. So much to choose from and it all looked delicious – and free! (Well, I say “free”, but we paid for it as part of the cost of the cruise, of course)

I forget what I ate at that meal, but I know I had a salad. My wife had a salad, too. Nothing too exciting during that particular meal.

The first few days

Now, I warmed up quickly to the buffet-style of eating. I was pretty settled in after the very first meal. Believe me, I was making the most of it. Just my breakfasts alone consisted of 4-6 blueberry pancakes or french toast, 1-2 omelets with everything, 2-3 big serving size spoonfuls of scrambled eggs, a large bowl of oatmeal with raisins, 2 boxes of cold cereal (usually Frosted Flakes), and 1 banana. Lunch and dinner were no much different as far as quantity, plus dessert.

This is what I look like when I eat

My wife, on the other hand, it took her a while before she loosened up and started eating anything closely resembling that of a “normal” person. You have to understand that my wife is complemented nearly daily by strangers (mostly women) who all say how inspired they are by her physique and her discipline (yes, I am a very lucky guy). As human beings, we all like it when we are complemented. It feels good, of course, but it also gives you the motivation to keep doing what you’re doing. Living a bodybuilding lifestyle and eating a clean diet takes hard work and sacrifice. And, unfortunately, being complemented also creates a bit if pressure for you to maintain what it is people find so admirable. It’s not them directly putting that pressure on you, it’s just the inherent desire to feed one’s ego and make people happy at the same time. Oh, and we were basically in bathing suits the whole week so I’m sure she was fearful of gaining weight and looking like a bloated whale despite my many failed attempts to convince her otherwise.    

I was a bit dissapointed because I felt like she wasn’t really enjoying herself and wasn’t doing what we were so excited about for the three months leading up to this cruise – that is, going off our regular diet and just enjoying different foods! I knew she wanted to but she just wouldn’t allow herself to really indulge. That wasn’t stopping me, though.

Still eating

Wearing down

Mid-way through the cruise I think Penny began to wear down. She had been trying to eat relatively clean and stay away from the calorie-heavy foods, the breads, and the desserts. But I think eventually the temptation became too great. After all, she had been watching me eat like a gluttonous pig and I still had my six-pack.

Finally she loosened up and began to really enjoy one of the main activities on a cruise, eating. Lots and lots of eating.

The ship had a whole separate dessert buffet with extravagant dishes, not just your typical restaurant-style dessert options. They had those, too, but there was also gourmet desserts that you didn’t know whether you should hang on your wall for display or eat. How was anyone going to resist that for an entire week!

Conclusion

Some people may have good intentions when boarding a cruise ship of eating well and staying away from the 24-hour pizza buffet or the freaking ridiculously delicious desserts. As in my wife’s case, maybe it works out that way in the beginning but eventually you succumb. There is nothing wrong with that. You shouldn’t take a cruise if you don’t plan on enjoying the food.

So you may be wondering whether Penny and I gained any weight. Yes, we did. It wasn’t much at all …3 pounds each. And I’ve already lost two of those pounds in the four days we’ve been back. If anything, my body really probably needed that break. My muscles seemed to have filled out some and my metabolism is stoked again.

How was your cruising experience? Did you stuff yourself like each meal was your last? How much weight, if any, did you gain?